Wednesday, August 07, 2002


This is Jeff's horoscope this week, from Free Will Astrology. And isn't it the most insanely beautiful day?

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Here are further signs that the
apocalypse may have already occurred. 1. An environmental
organization sent me five free Jennifer Lopez-themed
refrigerator magnets as a promotion for their new ecological
initiative. 2. A blind German psychic has announced that he can
divine the future by fondling people's naked butts. 3. Recent
polls report that for a majority of Americans, vacations are
exhausting and debilitating. 4. My mother just got her first toe
ring and my dad casually announced he believes that
"*everyone* is a performance artist." 5. The Piscean tribe is
finally ready to discover why there is a rowdy, regenerative
power in proclaiming to the world, "I am empty of all hope and I
don’t know anything!"


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